Hey, everyone. It’s Edwin and today
I have a special interview for you but, before we get into it, I want to give you guys
a bit of context so it all makes sense. Earlier this month, Trisha Paytas uploaded a video called me “MEET MY ALTERS | Dissociative Identity Disorder.” In this video, she mentioned that she diagnosed herself with the mental disorder and it upset a lot of people and especially people with DID due to her casual spread of misinformation regarding the disorder. “-My alters video.
If you guys don’t know what an alter is,
it’s people that have multiple personalities–” This came about a week after Anthony Padilla’s video on DID in which he interviewed several people about the disorder so he felt as if she was making a mockery out of it and shared this on his Instagram story. “-Cause when I watch other people talk about it, I’m like, ‘they’re crazy.’ Like, I watched the Anthony Padilla one and there’s a girl– ‘Dissassocia…DID’? Or something, I think it’s her name; she’s British and, uhm, like, I watched
and I was like, ‘oh, like, she… seems crazy’–” “–but I know that’s, like, what I sound like
now which is actually, like, really, really scary.” This lead Trisha to do a response video
enraged and exasperated towards Anthony. “This video is specifically to Anthony Padilla
who I f-cking loved, admired, respected.” But this video was also not well received. Throughout her videos,
Trisha mentioned dating someone with DID – that someone is a woman named Encina. I got in touch with Encina and proposed an interview because I thought it could be beneficial for her to share her perspective not only on everything that’s been going on but also just her experiences in general as someone who suffers with DID. This is my interview with Encina Severa. What was your initial reaction to Trisha’s video? -Honestly, okay, so… I saw it and immediately my heart, like, dropped and I just started
to feel nauseous, like, immediately. It wasn’t… and that was even before I saw the video,
I just saw the headline of it and I was just like, “oh, wow, I can’t
believe she did this” like… -The video is called “MEET MY ALTERS |
Dissociative Identity Disorder.”
-Yes. Just seeing that, I was– I was– I didn’t know what to think at first, I was just more hurt,
I think. Just because– [sighs] She didn’t tell me. And, for me, it just didn’t make any sense because when we dated–
-Right, because she da– yeah, she referred to you as, she says– something along the lines of
“I dated somebody with DID in the past.” “–beach and I was talking about DID there. I dated a girl who also had DID and we talked
about it a lot there; she has alters.” -That was one of the things that we, like,
connected on, like, was our mental health. We were both, like, “this is what I suffer
from, this is what I go through,” you know, “this is how I try to deal with it” like,
that kind of stuff and I told her that I have DID. “-Her and I, again, related on that sense of having episodes and having breakdowns and she was so open and she’s, like, “it’s okay'” -So, when she posted her video, she didn’t reach out to you beforehand to get any insight about that, correct? -No, not at all. -And did you reach out to her back or anything like that? -Like, after I saw the video?
-Yeah. -I– so I reached out to her, like, a few
days later cause I really needed to kind of– -Process it?
–process it cause, again, when I watched the video, I was hurt because she spread so much misinformation
for one and I think that’s why the community is so upset at her in general. For me, I’m– I’m not upset that she came out and said that she has DID; I’m upset about the misinformation. One thing that kind of hurt me was the fact that
she didn’t tell me, she didn’t bring it up to me, she didn’t say, “hey, this is how I feel, like, what do you think?” or anything. She didn’t get my opinion, she didn’t– whatever. Supposedly, we’re so close but she never once brought it up to me and now she’s coming out saying that she has this but she’s not even describing it in the correct way. -Before we went on to make this video, you told me that several of your alters were actually also upset, you know, from Trisha’s video. -Yes. -How does that work and– you know, of course,
correct me if I say anything in an improper way but, when you watched it, did they
also watch it after or how– how? -So some– some alters can be co-conscious. Basically where it– it kind of means where
they’re– they’re both looking out of the eyes, if you were to imagine the eyes as like
a window, at the same time. So we can be co-conscious to where we can
kind of be closer to the front as in fronting and sometimes, like, if one of them is super, super upset or something or, like, feeling a specific different feeling that I’m feeling, I can start to feel their’s
at the same time and it feels really weird. It– like, imagine as if, all of a sudden,
we started to kind of, like, meld into one and our thoughts kind of, like, wouh– it
would kind of be weird. -Yeah.
-Does that kind of make sense? -Yeah, yeah.
-Like, okay, so that can kind of happen
but that’s kind of how they’ve seen that. -Okay. -Think about it, like, say
you’re super into spicy food– -Yeah.
–but I am not, I can’t handle spicy food at all but all of a sudden we started mixing
and, all of a sudden, I was like, “I want spicy food” but I knew
I could not handle spicy food. -So–
-So all of a sudden I’m like, “I want this” like, but I don’t like it.
-Some of your alters– How many of
your alters like spicy? -[laughs] No, I’m just making an example,
like, if– as if me and you were [inaudible] -But you do have different taste buds essentially. -Yes, yeah. So some of them, like,
oh my god, yeah, absolutely. So some of my alters like sushi,
I do not eat seafood whatsoever. Anything that comes from water I guess. -Are you ever in the middle of eating sushi
and then– well, not you but one of your alters eating sushi then you– you come back and
you’re like, “ah, gross” or something like that? -So it’s, like, it hasn’t happened, like, in the middle of it, like, where
I’m, like, mid bite or anything, like, it’s usually, like, afterwards where I’ll kind of feel,
like, nauseous cause to me I think it’s the texture a little bit that I really
don’t like it but it’s also the– it’s, like, a fishy taste. -Yes, it lingers. -But also, because of that, I– it just gets to my head where I’m like, “oh… I feel nauseous, like, this just sucks so bad” so… Originally; so years ago, this was in, like, 2011, I was doing YouTube videos and my channel was based on
DID only. I made only DID videos but, back then, there
wasn’t a good support system like there is now. You know, back then, I only had negative comments. There was like–
-The stigma was stronger. -Yes, there was so much and there’s another
channel, “MultiplicityAndMe” who also was around that area or that time frame that did the same thing but we got so much hate and we never talked. Then I noticed her channel– she took her channel down and I ended up doing the same thing because I was like, “I am getting nothing but hate.” So years later, come around to now, I started to make the videos again and it’s more positive. So that’s a big reason why my alters didn’t want to do videos now, it’s because of how much negativity
there was and they were like, “I don’t want to be involved anymore” but when they saw this Trisha thing and they saw
how big the community got together, they were like, “we want to join in.” -If any of your alters want to speak up, can you– or can they choose to do that or would they choose to do that? -Yeah, they can come out. It’s not always, like, a fast, like, switch or anything. Switches can be very fast but then
they can also be really slow and kind of woozy, I guess, if that’s a–
–yeah. -So when you reached out to Trish after a few days,
what did you express to her? -I basically kind of broke everything down, you know? I explained why I was hurt, like, “why wouldn’t you have even come to me?” type of thing, like, obviously, you’re your own person so you don’t have to but I just kind of figured, “well, if we’re so close like you claim, then you would open up to me or ask my opinion or something” and I broke it down again even further where I’m like, “well, we dated… and you said you had it but you never came out and
told me so… it just doesn’t make any sense.” So I explained why the community
is so upset because of all the misinformation that she’s spreading which gives
more power to the stigmas and that’s something that we’ve
been working so hard to fight against so it’s just– it’s more work on our shoulders
that we kind of are trying to correct. -How did she respond to your concern? -She– it was very quick of a response.
She was upset that I was thinking that she was making those videos
for views and, for me, I was like, “well, it kinda seems like it because the way that you’re describing DID is completely wrong.” No, she doesn’t have to, like, explain herself, you know?
She can make videos on whatever she wants, obviously, however, I feel like it just– it would help
so much more if she would have at least, like, educated herself on the subject, you know, and didn’t claim to say “I have DID,
meet my alters” and especially since she has a video saying “Meet My Alters” like, her alters didn’t come out on the video, it was still just her describing her alters so it was, again, another kind of, like– it seems like a clickbait video. -And she followed it up with the video against
Anthony Padilla in which she was angry at him for calling that out, you know, because it seems as though she made it following his video spreading awareness on Dissociative
Identity Disorder but the way she said that the YouTuber DissociaDID “seemed crazy”
is very invalidating, I felt like.
-It’s incredibly invalidating. -To say that someone, I mean– I mean, because she was the only person in Anthony’s video
that switched on camera. -Yeah.
-So to say that she seems crazy I think is– yeah, I think that was probably the part that
could have definitely done without in her video. -Yeah, for sure. I mean, in general, most of the stuff that she said could have done without but that for sure being, like– she did state, in her text, you know, “I call myself crazy and I can call whoever I want crazy” and it’s like, yeah, you can but that
doesn’t mean you should. Like, it’s– especially with people with mental health, it’s not just
DID in general, like, you shouldn’t be putting anyone down in general but especially somebody
with a mental health disorder who it does discredit the things that they have gone through. It does say, “no, you haven’t gone through that, like, get over it” type of thing and that’s just not okay when you’re calling someone else crazy and I guess that was another thing that really hurt me where
I was like, “well, you’re calling her crazy, you’re saying people with DID are crazy, you know,
you thought that she was crazy” I’m like, “you thought that I was crazy then? You think that I’m crazy?”
you know, so I’m, like… -And that’s one of the reasons why I also wanted to actually proceed with this video because this isn’t something that’s very talked about, you know? And it’s not really so much about it’s a personal beef between you and Trish in any way, it’s more
so about the reason – that the root of it being such an invalidated thing, you know? -Yeah. -I found it a lot to wrap myself around when
I– because I have met you before and, when I saw that video on MedCircle, I saw Minnie
and I was like, “woah…” like… -[laughs]
-It was a lot. “-So what’s your favorite game? -Uuhhm… I dunno… -You don’t know.
-I like a lots of them. I used to go to the park all the time and we would go and– and go around the slide and go around like that and– and we would play a lot.” -It can be a lot, yeah. Especially, like– so, even for me,
a lot of people are like, “oh, well, how… how do you react to something like that?” and I’m like, “honestly, even for me, it can still be a little strange” because alters can be, like, animals or inanimate
objects or, like, you know, fairies and things like that, like, I have a fairy alter but, for me, I’ve talked to somebody who had, like, an animal alter and I, at first,
I was like, “how do I– how do I respond?” like, in my head, I’m like, “what do I– what do I do? Like, do I pet you?” -It’s–
-Like, it’s– -“Do I pet you?” [laughs]
-Like, seriously, like, you never know, like, some of them might want to be petted, like,
you know? I don’t know. -To hear somebody say, like, someone might
have just heard you watching this, like, “oh, I have a fairy altar,” they might think
“woah, she’s crazy” and, like, you know, maybe it’s a normal thought but to say
it in a serious manner, I think that’s, like, a very dismissive and that’s–
that’s what can be hurtful because it’s a real disorder. -Yeah. -But you’ve also said in the past that
you’ve seen some psychiatrists that “believe” in DID. Did you use that terminology because
there are some that don’t believe it? Like– -Oh, yeah. There’s a lot of doctors, therapists, psychiatrists that totally think it’s completely made up, they don’t believe it at all. But there have been scientific studies that have
been done with, like, brain scans and things like that to prove that things are changing within the body. -Yeah.
-So it just… -So the way you communicate with
your alters is you could either co-pilot– is that an appropriate way to say it?
Is it okay to say you co-pilot? -I mean–
-Because co-conscious seems to be the– -Yeah, co-pilot could be, like, you know,
you’re– you’re both “piloting” the body, you’re both– you know, that kind of thing so I guess it could be another term that somebody could use. -Casual, but co-conscious was, like, the technical term.
-Yeah. -But you can’t do that with all the personalities–
I mean, sorry, alters, right? -Mhm-hm. -Uhm… d-mn. See, now I screwed up.
I feel like I shouldn’t have said that. -No, you’re okay, you’re okay. -Uhm, yeah… Cause the technical term is “alters.” Like, “personalities” is not–
-Yes, because alters is basically cause it’s
an alternate state of consciousness, like, it’s your alternate, it’s an– it’s another being. -Uh-huh.
-So, yeah. -Yeah. Sorry. So back in another thing–
-No, you’re fine. -Another way you communicate besides, you
know, because you can’t co-conscious– be co-conscious with all your alters so you– you journal. -Yes. -Here I’m seeing the different handwriting’s and it’s… it’s interesting because, right here, it says,
“Entry about Minnie” as Minnie says, so you’re– is this– this is you being
co-conscious with Minnie and you writing for Minnie?
-Yeah, mhm-hm. -And then there’s Devon. -Devon is actually Minnie’s protector alter
so a lot of– I get– one of the biggest questions that I get about Minnie is “what if Minnie is out and something happens where she shouldn’t be around it? What if you’re driving and Minnie decides to come out? What if–” you know, whatever it is, so if there’s anything that a three-year-old should not be around, that’s when Devon comes in and is, like, “nope, come on, let’s– let’s come on in, let’s, you know, go somewhere else” type of thing. So… -Vehlani? -[laughs] So she’s kind of mischievous. [laughs] -Oh, she’s a teenager.
-She’s a teenager. -Yeah, that handwriting is definitely a teenager’s.
-Yeah, she’s a teenager, she’s 14. -“I’m not really sure what to write in this book…
all I know is that I’m bored. I want to come out and explore more.
I want to meet new people and have fun.” Has Vehlani’s attitude changed since 2014? -[laughs] She’s… from what I hear– I’m not co-conscious with her at all.
-Oh, okay. -Yeah, at all. So, when she’s out, I have–
I have no idea what’s happening at all. But, from what I know, she’s still the same. I… -Maybe we can ask her. -[laughs] -Does she come out or not? -I mean, she hasn’t come out in a long time
from what I know. Again, I– sometimes alters come out and
I have no idea which one’s come out.
-Wow, wow. -That’s– I think that’s a big reason why we decided,
like, a journal thing would be a good idea. -Yeah. -Not all of them use it but… [laughs]
-[laughs] C’mon, let’s all agree. -[laughs] – So, okay, then you have Elora. -Mhm-hm. -And she cleaned your room because you can be messy. -Mhm-hm. [laughs] -And what’s Elora’s story? -Uhm, so Elora is the fairy. -Ohh… -Mhm-hm. -That is very fairy like, very– -Sorry, I’m feeling very, like… I’m starting to feel, like, it’s, like, a dream. -Oh yeah? -So I’m feeling like an alter, like, really, really close. -Wants to say something? -Yeah, I mean, if… If they come out, they will but… [laughs] -Yeah and, you know, if they feel free to because this is, like, this is an open communication and, you know, the goal– the goal is shared here, we share the same goal to just spread awareness and do it in the most cautious and appropriate way so… -Mhm-hm. -So it feels, like, a dreamlike state? -Yeah, so, there’s different types of… dissociating… sorry, hold on.
-That’s okay. -Hi. -Hi. -Elora. -Elora, hey. I was just reading your entry
journal, what– from six years ago. [laughs] -Yes, from a long time ago. Uhm… what were we talking about? -Yeah, I was just asking about the other–
the other alters. Kind of how they co-pilot,
do you co-pilot with Encina? -Yes. Not all the time. -Okay. -Not all the time. When it comes to dissociating, it’s… it can be different for everyone. I think Encina was kind of explaining this
from what I remember so she was saying things can be very different, you know, one person can have a switch that’s a lot faster than another person’s and there’s two different kinds specifically
there are covert or overt. Basically, you know, you can have a
trigger to where it switches you instantly, you can have ones that make you feel very sleepy and what’s called you’re having derealization where you don’t feel like you’re in your body,
you don’t feel like you’re in the place that you’re in. -Okay. -So have you ever had, like, a feeling like that before? -When I’m about to kind of panic or pass out maybe. -Okay. Have you passed out? -Yeah. [laughs]
-Oh. [laughs] -Is it sort of like losing consciousness then or–? -Yes.
-Oh, okay. -Yeah, so when you– when one switches, I
should say one-one– when one switches, your– whoever is fronting gets brought back inside
and, again, you can either be co-conscious where you are both seeing what’s going on,
you are both kind of navigating things or one of the alters is navigating while the
other one is not and is just inside and can see or you’re completely dissociated where the person who is fronting and gets
brought inside can’t see anything. -Okay. So, at this point, it’s just Elora. -Mhm-hm. -How old are you? If you don’t mind me asking.
Sorry– or, how young are you? -I like to tell people that I’m really, really old
because I’m not in the double digits. -Oh. So what is it like to look in the mirror as a fairy? -So all of the alters see the same body. Like, I wouldn’t see myself as a fairy in the mirror
but on the inside I can see myself. -Okay. Do you enjoy being on the outside? -Yeah, mhm-hm. -What brings you up? What would you say,
I guess, sort of be the trigger? -Uhm so, again, it doesn’t always have to be a trigger for me to come out sometimes, you know? It can be as if, like, you go to sleep and then you wake up but you’re not waking up like I would wake up, so it doesn’t have to always be a trigger. But, for me, it usually tends to be something along
the lines of, “oh, let’s get things done around the house, let’s, like, make sure that, you
know, everything is in order when”– when Encina primarily is getting very stressed
because a lot of things are piling up, it’s when I can kind of help out. -Okay, so very protective, very– help take care of things.
-Mhm-hm. -What are some misconceptions that you think
should be brought to light and corrected as far as Dissociative Identity Disorder? -I think the biggest one is mainly that it’s not rare. A lot of people just haven’t been
diagnosed with it. The one thing– 1 to 3% of the population actually has been diagnosed which is literally the same as somebody with
Bipolar Disorder. -Wow.
-So it’s– it’s not as rare as people think it is. -And those are the people that have
been diagnosed so there’s likely more. -And there’s many more.
And I guess another thing would be not to take everything that Hollywood
puts out there as real, you know, obviously. A lot of other movies that you see, they’re over exaggerated and when it comes to DID, it’s unfortunate that pretty much all of the movies that have come out–
almost all of them I should say, have come out as being painted in a negative light. -For the person that has it. Like “Split.”
-Yes, mhm-hm. “-My name’s Hedwig. -How old are you? -Nine. -Don’t worry. He’s not allowed to touch you. He knows what you’re here for.” -One of his alters was a beast that had
extra power and, like– like, strength and that’s not something
that’s part of DID, like, having extra strength.
-No. Nhm-hm. -However, you know, alters can have
different taste buds and different– -Medical conditions, different likes, dislikes,
different genders, different ages so it’s– it’s, again, it’s very different for everybody. -Is there anything in particular that–
see, cause my immediate reaction is to think, “well, I already asked you about the Trisha video but I didn’t ask you, I asked Encina.”
-Yeah. -So is there anything that you would like
to say in that regard of Trisha’s video? -I’m really offended by it. I’m hurt that, you know, somebody who was very close to Encina would say something like this because, from what Trisha like led all of us to believe, was that she was close to Encina and that’s what we believed but since she came out and made that video, you know, it makes second thoughts happen and a lot of us were really, really upset and really wanted Encina to at least say something. I know Devon wanted Encina
to do a video with Trisha but, obviously, we were like, “that’s probably
not going to happen.” -Since this?
-So… yes. -Oh yeah, that was… -Yes. -What kind of personality does Dev– yeah,
what kind of personality does Devon have? -So Devon is– so, again, Devon is Minnie’s
protective alter but she’s also there to kind of make sure things are okay. She wants to, you know, not burn bridges and stuff.
-Okay. -She wants to be able to help to communicate, however, I think she was being optimistic. I think she was being hopeful and, you know, Encina was too. At the time, Encina was like, “she’s not
gonna do a video with me, it’s okay” and Devon was like, “no, you should ask her”
and Encina was like, “I’m not going to ask her.” So, I know Encina did give her
the option and said, “if you would like to” but she also said, “I feel like you should do a video and at least apologize in some way” because we did see the transitioning video or the– she came out as trans – she apologized later on and
I think that was a big thing that Encina was like, “well, I will just bring this up and hopefully she’ll be able to see this in a positive light to say something positive for the community” because it’s a hard thing to believe when you’re spreading misinformation, when you haven’t talked about it with, supposedly, the only person
that you know with DID. It’s just really hard to take it as this is a 100%– sorry, 100% truth. -Well, especially considering Trisha’s response
and Trisha blocked Encina on Instagram. -And, in a lot of her instances, she’ll claim
something like, “oh, why would you come for me?” It’s ridiculous, like, you wouldn’t– I think she said something about like, “you would never go after Shane.” “-You can’t come for, like, someone, like, your own level, like, he’s not gonna come for Shane Dawson, you know what I mean? It’s like– -Oh, he would never.
-Yeah.” -And those are false equivalencies too because, for one, Shane would not say that kind of thing and, if he were to, I think people would go after him, you know? -Well, no, I mean, she was saying that Anthony Padilla would never say anything or come after Shane. -But I still think that he would or he should,
like, if– if Shane Dawson were to say “I have Dissociative Identity Disorder” a week
after Anthony’s video, I would hope that Anthony would say something. -Yeah. -I mean, I don’t know but the harmful thing
about doing this sort of behavior online is that you’re gonna get
a lot of people that are upset rightfully so but they react in
an emotional manner which is, you know… People essentially should take a moment back
and, I mean, internet strangers don’t know– don’t owe her anything but I think that could
possibly play a role in perpetuating her behavior but, at the same time, in like making her
feel like, “I know what I’m doing” but… I don’t want this video or anything that we’re
saying to come off as if we have any ill intent because I would like the objective to be sort of accountability, like, realize what you’re doing and how it affects others because she doesn’t like it, she claims she doesn’t
like it when others do things to her so it’s kind of the thing like, “well, I call myself crazy
so it shouldn’t be a problem” well, you just– you don’t like this, other people don’t like that– -Mhm-hm. You know, obviously,
it’s hard to believe that Trisha really does have DID, however, if she does have it, you know, I feel like if she wants to get help and speak to a therapist, educate herself more on it and, you know, when it comes to seeing a psychiatrist,
there isn’t a medication that helps DID. There’s medications that can help the effects that
DID has because DID, you know, you’ll get anxiety or you’ll get depression at times
or, you know, things like that cause we have– everybody who has DID, has C-PTSD. -Have you ever met Trisha? Did you ever get to meet her?
-Not personally. -Okay. -We’ve never, you know, I’ve never
introduced myself but I’ve been near. -Do you have anything that you would say
to Trisha, like, assuming that she’s watching us right now, would you have
a sort of message? Or not, that’s okay too. -Uhm, I personally don’t. -Okay.
-I personally don’t, yeah. I think the biggest thing that we’re all appreciative
that you’re okay with doing a video like this. We did want to come out and do a reaction video in general to say our side and to kind of correct the things that she was spreading that’s, you know, not true so…
the fact that we get to do this is really nice. -Yeah. And I was telling Encina that if there’s, you know, what I just told you as well, like, there’s way too much footage that I’m gonna have and, so far, this is going really splendid and if she wants to, I mean, I’ll do all the editing, I’ll splice it together and
everything and send everything over and, if she wants to put it on her channel,
that’s totally fine with me but uhm… yeah. It was nice to meet you. -Hello. Encina. -Hey. How are you, Encina? So I just met the fairy, Elora. -I saw a little bit.
-Yeah? -I saw a little bit. Uhm… it’s… hazy. It’s hazy, uhm… Again, I would kind of describe it as dreamlike. -I get that feeling sometimes, like, when I’m almost,
like, awake and I feel like something is happening but then I wake up and it’s like, “well, that didn’t happen.” -Mhm-hm. -But it felt so real cause, like,
I can hear noises in real life. -Yeah. -The past couple days since Saturday, they were putting a door in and they were hammering it at 8:00 in the morning so I could hear
but I wasn’t fully awake and I felt, like, I was, like, texting someone and then
I woke and was like, “no, I didn’t.” -[laughs]
-Yeah, like, is it, like that? -Yeah, yeah.
So everybody dissociates. Every single person on the world dissociates.
-Okay. -However, there’s different types of dissociation,
you know? And the biggest dissociation that people don’t have, like, a disorder or like
an alternate personality type of thing, is when you are driving and you zone out
and, all of a sudden, you’re home. That’s a type of dissociation. -So we just filmed for about an hour and then,
you know, we took a little– a little break and you received a message. -Yeah, so I got a message on–
on Instagram from somebody. She just made another one,
I was like, “oh no…” [laughs] -So this– this video is called “My Alters SWITCH (Caught on Camera) LIVE FOOTAGE! | Dissociative Identity Disorder.” -And her main picture, her freakin’ thumbnail is her cross-eyed. -…Uh… yeah… okay. So, uhm…
-[laughs] -At least it’s only 11 minutes.
-Yeah. -She typically does longer video so h–
I mean, I don’t know, I feel– I feel… -[sighs]
-Okay, well… let’s save our commentary for– -Yeah, okay, all right. [sighs]